Last April, I was preparing a workshop on how Christianity and Finance for the Financial Services Ministry’s leadership retreat. On one of my readings, I learned about Shalom – God created the world in a certain way that will bring about Shalom. However, it is our sin that perverts the goodness of his creation and shatters Shalom.
I’ve realized that I have little concept of what a world in Shalom really looks like. Are we all supposed to be happy in Shalom? What are my motivations for working when I am in Shalom? What is finance supposed to really be, and how did God create it? During this time, Katherine Leary suggested that I join the Gotham Fellowship to wrestle this issue.
However, last April was also the time that my career was being turned upside down. I had been working on M&A deals for most of my working career, but I have not been doing any deals for the past year. With the credit markets still frozen, it would only be a matter of time before I would loose my job. I started to think about what I should really be doing with my life – should I leave finance? Should I go back and study to become another career? Should I leave New York and work somewhere else? What is God telling me?
Since then, I have lost my job. However, I have also decided to stay in New York. I believe that God wants me to learn to trust in him. But more than that, I need to understand him more so that I can learn to love him more.
In nine months, I hope that I can understand community better. I hope that I can wrestle, with other people, the image of what Shalom should be. But most of all, I expect to love others and be loved back.